"Stupid I still Miss You"-A Remixed Feeling

What is this? I found it interesting to read but I don't know why he wrote this and for also but he's my friend. once thought is he gone nuts but not really after reading this. I did not even think of editing it because I did enjoy reading his spelling and grammar mistakes. The below text is exactly what was written in his book of life. But whatever it may be I enjoyed reading hope you would do the same. It sounds Lyrical. The exact words as follows: 

"What can I do now? I have no choice left when you already said 'Thank You'. I can only do is just put a big full stop here. Before i did what i was gonna do i ask you and that might have been my mistake or good luck for you that i asked? I was never serious and i never wanted to be also. That’s my way of saying i am with you.

What could i do when you always thought that i didn't care for you when i really did? What could i do when you always thought i never missed you when i did miss you every time when i touched my cell phone? What could i do when you thought i was too flirty when i even forgot about the girls of past. What would i do when i myself said I Don't Love You when i really loved you? May be it was just I was dreaming.

Just everytime i was stupid when i called you and talked all those stupid things just to make you smile and laugh if not i could do those things like being stupid just for a smile on your face. How could i tell you i wasn't flirting when I was never serious? If i ever told you also that was gonna hurt me only never make any difference to you.

I always asked you whether your heart is already taken but you never said no when it was already given to somebody not probably the person I know. 'Is there somebody else in your mind?' 'Am I out of time?' these are what i asked you but with no answer I was shut down. Now you are only what I can think about. You light my life like nobody else though it was for short. I even couldn't look into your eyes just you were too beautiful. The more i try to forget you the more my head thinks of you. What the hell am i trying to do with my life? 

Ah! We had great fights out of fishy things and now it’s the best part of my memory. I always wanted somebody to come into my life accidently and stay for a purpose but i never thought that accident would be you and this painful that even the best doctors can't restore. I just want to shout Get Out of my head and mind but its helpless and useless for me to do that and no word can cure it. But i really wanted to say that you got that one thing which nobody did and what was that? It’s still unknown to me but you have it.

Just to make our talks more interesting though it was disturbing to you, i did add some lies to my bulls**ts. And that has become a reason to walk away. Somebody rightly said its better to fall from a bridge than falling in love. It hurts less.

I came to know what trust is only after I saw this angel walk past me. I couldn't trust you also for i thought i could do. You would not have made a mistake if you had shared me something which i always wanted to hear. And the way you always said you missed me was falling in my dumb ears sounding too flirty with echos. It would have been better if you could have said i trust you instead of i miss you when you didn't really miss me. But i do and still keep shut.

I know i couldn't treat you exactly the way you wanted but i really wanted to say 'Don't walk away from me. Cuz nobody's gonna treat you the same as me. I'll give you what you want' but i had nothing to give except for my heart which you said 'My Foot' when i offered. Girl i here i just wanted to ask you for one last time but i could only find myself out of time. It's my bad luck, never mind.

Oh yeah i really wanted to take you out' not for a date exactly but you never did you thought that m worth doing that. Your word that you spoke and over those which you didn’t speak out spoke less than your actions. In simple you speak less. 

Now how could i still say, 'Stupid I miss you' when you have build a huge wall with the bricks i provided myself. Hey i was little stupid also but not as much as you as I always told you that your choice's so wrong. Sometimes I was just tricky enough to gain your attention i told you bulls**ts and now i find it so funny and little paining. But I want to just ask how you could do this to me when you said you wanted to see stars in the day but now I can see both moon stars and moon along with you. Sounds funny yeah? It's funny. I remember you said too harsh when you did speak and i really thought over it. Am I really stupid to listen all this? I got yes, what to do now? Retry? Ignore? Abort? So it's just i wanted to stop this stupidity nothing more. I wanted to hug once so tightly but that also went in sleep. I can't believe I just said sleep, it's dream yeah.

I just tried to play it too cool when it did really mattered to you but I’m not sure. Why didn't you just vomit out whatever you wanted to, it would just keep you calm? I was just being manic to say i wanted to put you in the spotlight of my life when i really did stay in dark. It wasn't your mistake that i fell for you but my heart had this problem that whoever stays a little more in my life that i care too much.

'I would never let you fall down' what a lie? I really love this and it's one of the favorite lies out of all. I fell for you, why didn't you come that time? I may erase you from my head but getting you out of my heart lays a great problem. But tell me frankly how I could really trust you so blindly when I don't trust my dearest ones also. But the fact is you always hurt the one whom you love the most and hate them when time comes. But I can never think of it as it's out of my life's question.

Missing you is like breathing; i don't think about it, it comes naturally. Now i just look back at our old chats and think why I said that. It was just wastage of time completely. And the most interesting part is I would miss you calling out name. And i loved your voice so much when you called my real name though i hated to tell my name and when somebody uttered also it sounded funny. It’s so funny when i remember back how it really stared. It was just a intoxicated kiss between two stranger that put all those things together and messed up now. I'm little startled by those actions of yours, how could you? But it's totally worth it. And just a few days back i informed you your choice is so wrong and hope you’re doing that correction now. I had nothing to say when you called me talkative and creepy so i did lie many a things just to make you hate me. But why hate me when I want you? It's just that someday you would say 'Get Lost' and what I would I do that day. And I have experience, learn from it. But exactly after i told you those things i would regret and start missing you but how could i once more tell you that i was kidding.

Sometimes i just drop my eyes down and over ride my feelings why can't i still say it when i miss you like hell. If missing you is a crime then i should have been behind the bars as i did it infinite time but it’s just that nobody knows that i really do not even you. If I could say what I wanted to say then i could also say that's the exit please from my life. It’s really crazy how we fit though nobody thinks that we do. You have got that smile only which i saw it in my dreams brought down from heaven. It's everything i'm having and still let you walk so you can see what it would be like when someone really loves and when another person is flirting with you.

Rather, I would say if sky also falls also falls upon you i would be standing right by your side just that i could cover you not the sky. I gave my life for you just you are my dream and i want my dream come true, just to you. I can't even say I love you now but when I had a lot of chances to say when I was with you. By this time I have provided you enough reasons to hate me so you can always find someone better than me. But I don't want to be a hate person but it's completely worth doing for you. I may never come back but I'm always standing by your side.

Now i just take it as a dream that i woke up from but just wanna say 'Stupid I still miss you'"

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